According to fellow blogger Older Eyes, the Huffington Post says that Mondays are so depressing that the average American doesn’t crack a smile until 11.16 am. How do they know? Do they send out reporters with stopwatches?
Still, from my own experience of Monday mornings I’m very willing to believe this. However, 11.16 am for me on a Monday morning, especially one of those gloomy grey ones that we specialise in, here on Blighty, seems a bit optimistic. I mean, if you are facing a bit of a commute in California, possibly on a skateboard (I watch all the right movies, you know) and you can’t find your shin pads, then maybe 11.16 am would be a good time to start cheering up. After all, it’ll only be another hour and you’ll be able to go down to the beach for lunch and meet David Hasselhof for some surfing practice.
On the other hand, if you are hoping to get a Northern Line train to Mordern, and the bugger is delayed because the driver hasn’t turned up (he/she too, presumably being prey to the glums and having decided to stay in bed that morning, sensible person) then 11.16 am is probably going to come and go without any feeling whatsoever of joie de vivre. Ditto 11.17 am. And 11.18 am.
Now, older eyes recommends some nice things to cheer yourself up with. He starts off with medication, which I quite like the sound of, but I’m not sure I’m ready for that yet, and then he recommends reading the post on Tiny Buddha – simple wisdom for complex times entitled 51 Things That Will Make You Smile. He advises ignoring the bit where it suggests moving the furniture, and asking a child to do your hair, and I think he’s probably right. Especially on a Monday morning. Although if you need change for parking, you may want to think about tipping up the sofa. And if you find five pounds, well, you’ll be way ahead of the 11.16 deadline. Unless, of course, you have teenagers who suddenly need money for a school trip. In which case, again, you may not hit the 11.16 am target.
Tricky isn’t it? I mean, it does make you feel good when you tell someone how much they mean to you, and it is good to take pictures of things that cheer you up, or to read a kind letter from a friend. The trouble is, that Monday mornings are not built for this kind of stuff. Monday mornings are full of rush and confusion where you have time only to shout lost goodbyes and heartfelt instructions about forgotten PE kits and missing work shirts. The only possible reason for smiling at 11.16 am on a Monday morning, is because it’s nearly over. Which is also probably why I am writing this on a Tuesday.